Hello handsome,
First of all, thank you for completely changing my perspective on what a marriage should be. "True" love was never something I could believe in. I used to tell my girlfriends that love was just a chemical reaction in the brain that would slowly fade over time. After all, about 30% of marriages that began in the 1990s won't reach a 15 year anniversary, and although the feminist movement is making that percentage drop, it wasn't enough for me to feel secure about a long-term relationship. In 2014, the divorce rate was 46.37% of the marriage rate. All in all, the odds were not in my favor. I've believed this for so long, so for me to commit to you, for me to say, "Yes, I do want to spend the rest of my life with you," - sleeping next to the same person every night, waking up to see the same face every morning with the possibility of you breaking me - is a big deal. You've opened my eyes to the person everyone but me knew I would become. You've made me feel secure.
Thank you for respecting me and supporting every decision I've made regardless if you agree with it or not. Had you not done either one of these things, you would have lost me a long time ago. It takes a special type of person to resist transforming based on the group of people you're with at the time. And regardless if we are with your friends, your family, my friends, my family, your coworkers, or just by ourselves, you never speak poorly of me or our relationship. You never have an insidious agenda or lie or pretend to be anything besides who you truly are, which makes me want to do the same.
Thank you for not just being a feminist but also a humanist. Thank you for standing up for me, and in turn, every other woman and man that hasn't reach 100% equality because society won't let us. You may have not noticed, but I saw you give up your seat in the waiting room for the elderly man who walked in with a cane; I saw you open the handicap doors that were broken for the woman in a wheelchair; I saw you tell that man at the bar to stop disrespecting and degrading the bartender just because she was black and a woman (because we both know that man wouldn't say the same things to another white man); I saw you stick up to your conservative grandparents while they talked about immigrants and homosexuals. You thought I didn't notice, but I did.
Thank you for rushing home from work to deliver tissues imbedded with lotion because I was sick and you know that's the kind I like. You also never judged me for being a writer and never degraded my degree because others told you it wasn't "practical." You know I love doing what I do, and you support me unconditionally.
Thank you for never making me question your moral or ethical standards. This way, I know I'll never have to worry about you thinking about another woman or wondering what you're doing while you are out with your friends. I never feel the need to look at your phone because you are so transparent and true. You tell me you love me and that I'm beautiful almost every day. I know it's true; I can feel it when you hold my hand or brush my hair from my face or when you rub my back as I'm falling asleep or my shoulders as I'm trying to wrack my brain for some new content.
But most of all, thank you for loving me for the person that I am, not the person everyone else has created in their heads. I know that it's hard when I do something to let you down. I want you to know that it's never on purpose; disappointing you is one of the worst feelings. Yet, you forgive me, because you know this is just who I am and you love me more for it.
Thank you.
Forever yours,
The woman you married
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/12/02/divorce-rate-declining-_n_6256956.html
http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/nvss/marriage_divorce_tables.htm
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